


You're Not Here

by OkamiShadou98



Series: Deckerstar Cuddles Collection [1]
Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Cuddles, F/M, Nightmares, Protective Chloe, bit of angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-10
Updated: 2021-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-16 23:13:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29957340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OkamiShadou98/pseuds/OkamiShadou98
Summary: Unbeknownst to Chloe, Lucifer suffers from nightmares. When a late night gives her the opportunity to witnesses his subtle reactions, she sooths her Devil to sleep.Or Lucifer has a nightmare and Chloe decides to cuddle it away.
Relationships: Chloe Decker/Lucifer Morningstar
Series: Deckerstar Cuddles Collection [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2203293
Comments: 21
Kudos: 204





	You're Not Here

**Author's Note:**

> This is going to be a whole series of Deckerstar cuddle one shots that I'll be adding to as I get ideas. I love to write cuddles but can seldom work them into my longer fics so now they're all going here.
> 
> I hope you enjoy and let me know what you think!

The exposed bulb of the desk lamp created an unpleasant halo around Chloe’s laptop, illuminating the opened files scattered around her home desk. Her eyes watered from the brightness, or maybe it was the late hour. The digital clock in the corner of her screen indicated it to be past eleven now, the world outside her windows an inky black. Trixie had long gone to bed, the small condo silent aside from the irregular tapping of her keyboard keys and the quiet hum of the television across the room. 

Her desk was located in what had once been the dining area of her house. But the table that had come with the place had been seldom used, Chloe preferring to eat on the stools lined up at the kitchen counter rather than do full sit down dinners. So, she’d donated the table to a humanitarian group and Lucifer had found her a nice desk, nondescript enough to match the rest of her furniture but still of a high quality. He’d even spent an afternoon sanding and re-staining it outside in her minimal yard space, deeming the project too important to be handled by anyone but himself. She hadn’t realized he knew how to refinish furniture, but she shouldn’t have been surprised. He excelled in virtually everything else he did, even if he was a novice. Besides, she wasn’t going to complain when she’d gotten to see him in regular jeans and a tee shirt for the first time since he’d spent that day dressed like Dan almost three years ago.

Having a proper desk at home meant she could spend an hour or two every evening reviewing current cases or finishing paperwork after Trixie had gone to bed. It gave her a bit more time with her daughter, who was on the cusp of being a teenager and had started that slow but inevitable drift away from her parents. Tonight, however, she had worked far later than usual, the stack of files beside her a menacing reminder of how much she still had to do.

The backlog of work was thanks to a poorly timed vacation out east to visit her mother, who’d gotten hurt whilst attending a convention and was now laid up in the hospital. Lucifer and Trixie had accompanied her on the abrupt trip and, thanks to Lucifer’s knowledge of the city, the three of them had managed to have a fun time exploring the city. Now, she was paying dearly for the week off. 

Two cases which she’d previously thought closed were being scrutinized by the higher-ups, meaning all the paperwork had to be re-examined by her. Then there was this week’s case which involved a prominent public figure and had become an absolute PR disaster. If she was extraordinarily lucky, she might finish by midnight.

She looked up from her computer, blinking aching eyes, and leaned to the left to catch a glimpse of the long figure lounging on the couch on the opposite of the room. The stairs obstructed her view of the TV screen but whatever was on must not have been all that interesting as Lucifer was dozing sitting up, head tilted forwards so his chin nearly rested on his chest. She’d warned him earlier that she was going to be saddled with work all evening, but he’d still decided to stay up and wait for her rather than to check in on Lux or go to bed upstairs.

She shouldn’t have been surprised that Lucifer had become a nightly fixture in her bed after only a few weeks of dating. Even when she’d refused to engage in sex when Trixie was home - and enacted a strict pajama pants rule - he hadn’t complained. Instead, he’d showed up at her house the very next day, an armful of flannel and silk sleep pants folded neatly in his arms. They’d cleaned out a drawer in her dresser for him to put his things, which felt like a bigger commitment than it should’ve been given all they’d gone through, and that had been that. She’d wanted to reciprocate, but her ability to spend nights at the penthouse was limited, completely at the mercy of her daughter’s schedule.

At the beginning, she’d wondered if Lucifer was annoyed by the fact he had to spend most nights at her house if he wanted to sleep with her. His bed was far larger than her own - custom made, no doubt. Meanwhile, she had only a queen sized bed. And while it was certainly roomy enough when she was alone, Lucifer somehow managed to swallow all the available space with his mass, long limbs leaving precious little room. Her sheets were worn and stretched versus his silk ones. She only had a few lumpy pillows whereas Lucifer was more accustomed to sleeping with three or four just for himself.

But he’d never complained about the arrangement. If anything, he was _impatient_ to get to bed most evenings. If she spent too long going over case files, he would naturally migrate closer to the stairs, hopping from chair to sofa to chair until he ran out of furniture. Why he never outright said he wanted to go to bed, she didn’t know. He was more than welcome to retire early if he wanted to, she’d told him often. He was all but living with her full time, after all, and the house was becoming just as much his as her own.

He never did take her up on the offer, always waiting for her. Most evenings, it was fine. Lucifer kept odd hours for Lux and usually didn’t have much issue staying up late. But lately he seemed to tire more easily. She suspected, without the rampant drug use and adrenaline of partying, his internal clock was resetting to something more resembling human. He liked to sleep in, took naps during the weekends, and no longer viewed lazy days spent inside watching movies as boring or wasteful. Of course, he still always had ten times more energy than anyone else during the day. 

Some things were never going to change.

Chloe rose and stretched, a jolt of pain shooting through the tight muscles of her shoulders. As cute as it was he wanted to wait for her, she couldn’t leave him on the couch when she wouldn’t be finished for hours. 

Approaching his slumped form, she contemplated how to rouse him. Though he was growing more and more comfortable with touch all the time, he still startled on occasion. No matter how long he spent away from Hell, it seemed this particular instinct of jerking awake ready to fight would never truly fade. Location, position, it didn’t matter. He was a warrior, even retired.

She settled for nudging his leg with her foot. “Lucifer?” she said softly.

He made a snuffling noise in response, head bouncing slightly. He remained asleep though, hands clasping the remote in his lap.

“Babe, come on. Wake up.” She nudged him harder.

There was that instinctive sharp inhale as he sat up, his eyes flying open and bouncing wildly in his skull as he scanned his surroundings. When he gaze settled on her, he relaxed and sank back against the cushions.

“Wha-” he cleared his throat, voice hoarse from sleep. “What time is it?”

“11:30.” Now that he was awake, she came closer, their legs brushing. “You fell asleep.”

“Oh.” His eyes were still heavy and glazed with sleep, words slurred.

She smiled down at him, enjoying this moment where he was completely unguarded. His clothes were wrinkled, his hair was starting to curl, and his posture was off as he slumped to one side. Reaching down, she ran a hand through his hair, pieces curling up into little gravity defying mountain peaks.

His eyes slid closed again as he pressed into her caressing hand, a delighted mumble rumbling in the back of his throat like a low, rusty purr. She fluffed his hair more, encouraging the strands to stand upright.

“You should go to bed,” she said, voice still no more than a whisper.

He hummed in agreement but made no move to stand. She scratched the top of his head lightly before retracting her hand, knowing he wouldn’t get up otherwise. One of his eyes peeled open to give her a disapproving look and she laughed.

“Bed,” she repeated, taking a step towards the stairs.

Predictably, he followed, heaving himself to his feet with a yawn. For all the fluid grace he usually possessed, Lucifer was rather clumsy when he was tired. His hip knocked into the couch as he shuffled in her direction, blinking slowly. When he reached the stairs, hand gripping the railing to keep himself steady, he seemed to realize she wasn’t coming with him. He looked over his shoulder, brows knitted in confusion.

“I have a bit more work to do,” she said, answering his unasked question.

Lucifer swayed on the first step of the stairs, turning this over in his head before hopping back down onto the floor. “I’ll stay. Wait for you.”

She shook her head. “No, you’re tired. Go on ahead. I’ll be up in less than an hour.”  
He didn’t seem to approve, holding out his hand and making a childish gesture for her to accompany him. It was enough to nearly break her resolve. 

When in public, Lucifer was rarely so soft. He cared for her deeply, she knew that. But he struggled with showing that when there was an audience. Only when the two of them were alone would he behave like this, reacting without thought to how others were perceiving him. There was no need for him to be suave or powerful, just himself.

He did need to sleep though and she wouldn’t have him camping out on the too small couch when there was a perfectly good bed upstairs. Steeling herself against his sad eyes, she pointed to the stairs. “I’ll be right behind you, okay? Promise.”

For a long moment, he continued to stare at her vacantly. Then he nodded sluggishly. “‘Kay,” he mumbled, dragging himself up the stairs.

She waited at the bottom, tracking his heavy footfalls overhead until she heard him enter their bedroom. Satisfied he wouldn’t be able to resist falling asleep, she returned to her desk and settled in for another hour of work.

\---------------------

1:00 a.m. came and went before Chloe admitted defeat. She’d made enough of a dent in her work stack to merit turning in. Whatever hadn’t been completed was officially for future Chloe to worry about.

She spent a few minutes tidying up and checking on Trixie before hauling herself upstairs, taking care to avoid the steps that creaked. The bedroom door was only partially closed and she managed to slip inside without opening it further. It took her eyes a minute to adjust and pick out the lump in her bed that was Lucifer.

Having already gotten into pajamas earlier, Chloe simply slid off her socks and brushed her teeth before slipping into her side of the bed. She double checked her alarm was set, stomach dropping as she counted how many hours of sleep she would be getting, and then rolled over to face Lucifer, who was lying face down, head buried in his pillow. 

She scooted closer to him, curling into his warm side. Though they’d agreed that pants were to be worn at all times, Lucifer usually forwent a shirt - for both their sakes. He ran hot enough as it was without adding on more fabric. Besides, Chloe enjoyed feeling his soft skin and the solid muscles below. He was always wearing layers during the day.

Lucifer didn’t even move as she shifted herself into a more comfortable position, her head pressed into his shoulder and one of her bent legs curling over his own. Sleep tugged at her mind viciously and she sank into the feeling, drifting off-

Lucifer moved.

She blinked, unsure whether or not she’d even fallen asleep. No time seemed to have passed and there were no shadows to indicate the hour. Closing her eyes again, she waited for him to settle himself. But instead, Lucifer twitched again, almost rolling on top of her as he flipped onto his back.

“Hey!” she grumbled, sliding as far from him as she could. Usually, Lucifer was a quiet sleeper. 

Instead of getting an explanation, all she heard in the darkness was a small whimper, so quiet it was almost lost to the humming of the air conditioning. Chloe froze, waiting to see if the noise repeated. She knew most of Lucifer’s vocalizations by now, the small sounds he made while concentrating or when he was in pain. She’d never heard him whine like that though, awake or asleep.

Just when she’d decided the noise was a one off thing, he repeated it, twitching slightly. She leaned closer, seeking him out in the dark.

“Lucifer?” she whispered, on the off chance he was awake.

Her hand landed on his bare stomach, his skin sweaty. Was he having a nightmare? To her knowledge, he’d never had one before.

“It’s okay,” she said, stroking his stomach, feeling his body push against her hand with each breath. “Lucifer, you’re okay.”

Her fingers played over his belly button - which she’d always been confused about him having, as an angel - and rose up to his ribs. It was the same way she’d calmed Trixie when she was small and suffered from intense nightmares.

Lucifer was strangely quiet. Aside from his initial jolt onto his back, there was hardly anything to suggest he was suffering. Worry clawed at her. Did he have nightmares often but they just didn’t wake her up? Was this why he was so adamant he not go to bed without her?

She wasn’t sure whether to leave him be or wake him up. Her touch seemed to sooth him for a bit, his twitches subsiding. But he was still whimpering, little hitches in his breath she could feel beneath her hand. She looked to her clock, trying to gauge how long it had been. Five minutes? Seven?

“Lucifer. Lucifer, wake up.” She moved to shake his shoulder, unwilling to watch him suffer for so long. 

He didn’t awaken though. At least, not fully. Instead, he rolled towards her, his firm arm catching her around the middle and dragging her to him like a stuffed animal. She scrambled for purchase, trying to escape as he clutched her to his chest, folding around her tightly like a heating blanket. Her knees were forced to her chest as his own legs pressed her into a ball, practically smothering her. She tried to get loose, but her back was firmly stuck against his back, his arms pinning down hers as he hugged her fiercely. Heat rolled off him, skin tacky with sweat.

Great, she was going to die from heat stroke because her boyfriend was a cuddly furnace.

“Lucifer,” she said at regular speaking volume. “Lucifer, wake up!” She wriggled as much as she could.

And there was that answering tightness, his breathing harsh as he jumped to wakefulness. She could feel how alert he was behind her, his every muscle prepared to fight. Then, it drained away, his arms loosening around her and his legs uncurling. 

He said something into her hair that was garbled and unintelligible. She reached behind her clumsily, rubbing the back of her hand along his side.

“Nightmare?” she asked.

He nodded, scruff scraping her neck.

“Do you want to talk about it?” She continued petting him.

He shook his head this time, a no. 

Okay, she could deal with that. Lucifer didn’t seem too shaken now that he was awake. But whether that was because the dream itself hadn’t been that bad or was a sign of just how often he had these nightmares, she didn’t know. In any case, now probably wasn’t the best time to talk about it. 

“Babe, roll over.” She rocked backwards a bit to encourage him.

At first, he tried to bring her with him, unwilling to release her. But eventually she got him on his other side, the wide expanse of his back facing her. She snuggled closer, trying to decide how to arrange herself. She wasn’t often the big spoon when they cuddled, Lucifer being more comfortable with affection if he was one giving it. But they’d done this a few times, perhaps not enough given his confused reaction to her request.

Just as she was trying to place her arm in a position that wouldn’t give her pins and needles come morning, he again moved to face her. Before she could say anything, he’d pressed his face into the hollow of her neck and shoved his feet under her own. She was caught off guard, so much so, she simply wound her arms around him. He didn’t seem so big in this position, the top of his head ticking under her chin.

His breathing evened out after a few tight inhales as he deflated beside her, weight settling properly onto the mattress. Chloe peered down at him, at the few features she could make out from her angle. His nose jutted out from his face, a feature she thought might look awkward on someone else but he wore well. The same went for his ears, which perked out a bit like a kitten’s. His hair had worked itself into full curls now, spilling over the top of his head like a nest - she dare not even think the word cherub. He always seemed to know when she was comparing him to something Heavenly, even though she never voiced it aloud.

She kissed his forehead, a muzzy burr all received in response. Tomorrow, they would sit down and talk about this properly, about whatever it was that plagued him. She wanted to know. It wasn’t just the conventional things she loved about him, though there was much to be said for those traits too. It was his aquiline nose, his protruding ears, his messy hair. And deeper than that, she loved his humor and his pain, his joy and sorrow. She held it all close to her heart every day. And now, his nightmares would join that list, and become something she too loved. Just as she loved his dreams.

“Goodnight, Lucifer,” she whispered into the void of darkness surrounding them.

He didn’t answer, but she thought he pressed a bit harder into her neck, nuzzling against her. 

And when sleep claimed them, it did so peacefully.


End file.
